Better Boundaries for Teachers

When you think about what charges and depletes your educator battery, you probably list relationships as both a charger and a depleter. For the most part, my colleagues keep me charged and keep me going. They encourage me and pick me up when I’m struggling. But I have this one colleague who consistently depletes my energy. We’ll call her Janice. Janice complains about everything. Remember that Saturday Night Live skit, Debbie Downer? Janice makes Debbie look positive. I’m not proud to admit this, but when I see Janice coming, I pick up my phone and pretend I have a call. Chances are, you have a Janice, too. One of the best ways to protect yourself from the Janices in your work and personal life is to set clear boundaries.

Boundaries are the invisible lines that define what is acceptable and what isn’t in your professional and personal relationships. When considering your boundaries, take time to think about your needs, preferences, and personality. What makes you comfortable and uncomfortable? What behaviors interfere with your sense of safety and peace? Cultivating awareness can give you more clarity about the boundaries you need to draw. This can help protect your time, energy, and emotional well-being. Let’s explore five types of boundaries every teacher should consider.

Time Boundaries

Time is one of your most precious resources. Without boundaries, it’s easy to let work consume your mornings, evenings, and weekends. Setting time boundaries means defining when you will and won’t work. For example, establish a cut-off time for answering emails or grading papers. You might say, “I don’t check emails after 6 PM” or “Weekends are for rest and family.” Communicate these boundaries clearly to students, parents, and colleagues to prevent misunderstandings. Then consistently hold those boundaries so work tasks don’t begin to creep into your personal life.

Emotional Boundaries

Teaching is an emotionally demanding job, but you don’t have to carry the emotions of your students and colleagues. Emotional boundaries help you maintain empathy without absorbing others’ emotions. A good practice is reminding yourself, “I can care deeply without taking on this burden as my own.” Emotional boundaries may be easier to uphold when you imagine a bubble around yourself. You can be present with others and express empathy without letting those heavy emotions into your bubble.

Physical Boundaries

Physical boundaries ensure your personal space and well-being are protected. This could mean deciding how comfortable you are with physical contact, like hugs or pats on the back. Don’t feel pressured due to fear you may hurt someone’s feelings. Physical boundaries also include ensuring you have breaks throughout the day—like actually sitting down to eat lunch instead of working through it. You may need to put a sign on your door letting others know that you are taking a few minutes of uninterrupted quiet time.

Workload Boundaries

Committing to every request—leading committees, mentoring new teachers, covering extra duties—can quickly lead to exhaustion. Workload boundaries involve knowing your limits and being comfortable declining. There are ways to say no with ease and grace. For example, “Thank you for thinking of me, but I just don’t have to capacity to do that right now.” Before agreeing to extra tasks, ask yourself if the task is aligned with your current priorities. Do you have the capacity to take it on without sacrificing your well-being? If not, politely decline the opportunity.

Communication Boundaries

Clearly communicating boundaries helps set expectations with students, parents, and colleagues. If you don’t want parents texting you at all hours, establish preferred methods of contact, such as email during work hours. Similarly, define how you want to handle student interactions, whether that means denying last-minute meeting requests or addressing classroom concerns at designated times. Communication boundaries also include topics of conversation. Determine what you will share with students and colleagues, and let people know if you are not comfortable with certain topics, such as politics or religion. Hold a firm boundary around talk that makes you uncomfortable, such as gossip.

How to Set and Keep Boundaries

Once you’ve identified your boundaries, communicate them clearly. Researcher and author, Brene Brown, says clarity is kind. It’s unfair to be upset or offended by someone if we haven’t shared our boundaries. Once boundaries have been set, be consistent because inconsistent boundaries cause confusion and distrust. People may react negatively at first, but your well-being is important, and you are worth protecting. Remember, setting boundaries isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. An energized teacher is far more effective than a depleted one.

As the school year progresses, check in with yourself. Do your boundaries need adjusting? If something isn’t working, tweak it. As your life changes, your boundaries will change, too. When you are going through a difficult season, boundaries are essential.

Final Thoughts

Boundaries are the key to longevity in teaching. Setting boundaries is not a sign of caring less; instead, it means you care enough to find ways to persist. By setting and maintaining clear boundaries, you can continue to show up for your students with energy, passion, and joy. And that’s a lesson worth modeling for them, too.

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